April Stocks
ENGL 2010
No Good Reasons
Once during an argument with a cousin of mine I was taken out of my cozy and comfortable bubble that I live in day to day, realizing that people are not much more accepting within race lines than in the earlier years of the 1960’s. My husband is African American and my cousin chose to speak badly about him and our relationship by using one of the worst racial terms that you can use, because I don’t even like to quote the word, we will just call it the N word. My heart sank and I thought over and over while crying, why in the world would others discriminate because of someone’s color of their skin? I still don’t understand no matter how hard I try. Aren’t we past those days? Then she furthered my reality check by stating that we don’t belong together because I am white and he is black simply put with no reasoning to back the statement up, also pushing my thoughts into thinking that our daughter together isn’t accepted by her and other people as well. Discrimination against interracial relationships and marriages is still a problem in our society today with only 63% of Americans approving of these types of unions. Although there are many races that can comprise an interracial union I am going to be very specific in talking about African American and Caucasian interracial relationships in context because this is what I have experience with.
Until the Supreme Court ruled against anti-miscegenation laws back in 1967 around one-third of the states within the United States banned unions between people of different races. Maybe this is where some of the hatred and judgmental behavior towards interracial relationships comes from? I’m pretty sure that a good amount of the older generation uses this as an excuse to be closed minded. I am familiar of the saying you can’t teach an old dog new tricks but it has been proven that you in fact can. Why can’t we all let go of the past whether it be a Caucasian person who thinks they are more superior to people from the African American race or whether it be an African American person who is against Caucasian people because of what happened during the days of slavery. I understand that this is what many people have been brought up to believe especially back in the days before and during the Civil Rights Movement, but we can move on. It is now almost a half of a century later. The world has changed, technology has changed, science has changed, all much more advanced, why can’t our views and attitudes advance at the same speed? Just because someone has been raised to think that people were made unequally doesn’t give any true justified reasons to continue these beliefs.
Another argument that people use to back their racist and discriminatory thoughts is the fact that they believe that if they have had one bad experience within a specific race that the entire race is the exact same way as the one person with whom they shared this bad experience. Let’s just start using common sense here and think about it in terms of your own race. What if someone came to you and said, “All _insert your race here_ people are lazy, or disgusting, and not intelligent”, now how do you feel about that comment. How do you feel about what that person said basing their opinion of your entire race from an experience of one or even a few people of your race and said you are the exact same as the others? I am sure that it didn’t make you feel good and even made you question thinking about if you have ever done that to a specific race, culture, ethnicity, or even gender for that matter. I still don’t find any solid reasoning to back up the statement that people should not marry interracially.
I have also heard that people have based the belief that races shouldn’t marry interracially is because God is against mixing “blood”. Not one place in the Bible does it say that we are not supposed to marry interracially, the only thing that it does in fact say is that we should not marry people from different religions or between believers and non-believers. So this reasoning is now ineffective for means of support for the argument that races should not marry or create a union, unless one is a believer and the other is a non-believer. I still think that this decision should be up to the couple to decide and not up to anyone else to judge though because we are not the ones living their lives.
Many people like to argue because someone may look different on the outside that they are different on the inside as well or even that God made them look different because of inferiority. This is all wrong. Biology has now found that races are no different on the inside although we may look different on the outside, race is only a social term that is used by people to classify one another. Science has discovered after many studies that no bodily function or disease is different or more common in one race than another. The reasons we all look different is because our bodies and features of our bodies have adapted to our environments over time and of course genetics is what passes these features along. For example the only reason that Africans are mostly darker skinned is because their bodies produce a specific type of melanin (the pigment that makes up our skin color controlled by genes) eumelanin. Eumelanin is common in people who live in tropical latitudes of the world which is an adaptation their bodies made to the environment in which they live. Of course if someone who wasn’t born in that region but has ancestors who come from or originated from that latitude of the world, then they can also carry this type of melanin resulting in darker skin tones. So, is this really a good reason to back up the statement that people from different races should not date or marry or that they are inferior in any type of way now that science has explained why we look different?
At this point I have exhausted all reasons that I could come up with through research and thought that could make people against interracial relationships. As far as I can see there is no real, solid, or factual reasoning that anyone can use to support the argument against interracial unions. Yes, everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but is it wrong for me to ask everyone to think outside of the box and maybe change their minds about being accepting of all people and their relationships?
The hurt that my family goes through when we get mean looks or rude comments from people saying that we shouldn’t be together based only upon the different colors of our skin is beyond ridiculous. It makes me want to say to them, “Who are you to decide what’s good for me and for my family, who are you to decide what is right or wrong?” To be honest, I am grateful that we are in a time that is more accepting of our relationship than back in before the Civil Rights Movement because I would hate to be imprisoned, or worse, for my husband to be killed just because we happened to fall in love with each other. Still there is much room to grow when it comes to acceptance throughout society based upon this matter. We need to stop thinking in terms of the “norm” and actually get rid of the term “the norm”. Think for a moment, what if it was wrong within society for you marry who you are currently married to or it was wrong to date the person you are dating? Would you like the hurtful comments or stares? Would you like for someone else to tell you that your relationship is right or wrong? I know that there will most likely never be 100% acceptance of interracial relationships but no matter who is accepting of mine and my husband’s relationship I will continue to love and cherish the wonderful man that he is and I can only hope that it will one day reach 100% acceptance for the greater good of all mankind. Discrimination against anyone can be considered a type of hate and hate is something that can consume your very being. Only when we get rid of hate in all aspects of our lives is when we could all live in harmony within society.
Works Cited
Page-Gould, Elizabeth, Ph.D. "Greater Good." Research on Cross-Race Relationships: An Annotated Bibliography. N.p., 1 July 2004. Web. 30 Sept. 2013.
McNamara, Robert P., Maria Tempenis, and Beth Walton. Crossing the Line: Interracial Couples in the South. Westport, CT: Greenwood, 1999. Print
Smith, Earl, and Angela Hattery. Interracial Relationships in the 21st Century. Durham, NC: Carolina Academic, 2012. Print.
Sollors, Werner. Interracialism: Black-white Intermarriage in American History, Literature, and Law. Oxford: Oxford UP, 2000. Print.
Lehmiller, Justin, Dr. "Interracial Marriage Has Reached An All-Time High, But Attitudes Toward It Are Still Evolving - | - Science of Relationships." Interracial Marriage Has Reached An All-Time High, But Attitudes Toward It Are Still Evolving - | - Science of Relationships. N.p., 13 Apr. 2012. Web. 30 Sept. 2013.
"Is Interracial Marriage Biblical?" RACIAL ISSUES- • ChristianAnswers.Net. N.p., n.d. Web. 09 Oct. 2013.
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Jones, Michela, and Karla Roberts. Psych.hanover.edu. N.p., n.d. Web. 9 Oct. 2013. <http://psych.hanover.edu/research/thesis07/jonesrobertspaper.pdf>.
"All in the Family? Report Finds Growing Acceptance of Interracial Marriage in US." NBC News. N.p., n.d. Web. 09 Oct. 2013. <http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2012/02/16/10419249-all-in-the-family-report-finds-growing-acceptance-of-interracial-marriage-in-us?lite>.
"Human Biological Adaptability: Skin Color as an Adaptation." Human Biological Adaptability: Skin Color as an Adaptation. N.p., n.d. Web. 09 Oct. 2013. <http://anthro.palomar.edu/adapt/adapt_4.htm>.
